Today I've
thoroughly and
completely and
emphatically come to the conclusion that being a mom is hard work. Wonderful - yes... but still very hard work.
I keep wondering if my life could get any harder.... okay, I know it could get a lot harder... and I better just pray that it won't since I'm barely staying afloat. I'm learning it's not about doing more but
doing WISELY.
I called my mom and she listened to my bawlings for an hour or so. She gave me the encouragement I needed to keep a goin'. We all need encouragement, don't we?!
The other day I was asking the kids if they knew what Dad did at work. They didn't really know - so we talked about it. Then I told the kids why I didn't have a job outside the home... that I wanted to stay home with them to be a mom. Then I added that my job didn't earn any money, but it was a good job. Hannah came right over and gave me a big hug and kiss and said,
"There is your money mom." Yesterday she thanked me for all of my
"efforts in being a good mom for our family." I cherish my Hannah.
This entire section on Personal Revelation in
Julie Beck's recent conference address has been on my mind the past few weeks. I keep rewatching it or reading it to let it sink deep into my heart. I could probably give some comment on every sentence, but mostly - it's all so true... so good... and so applicable in my life.
I find myself frantically trying to find answers to mothering things like how to teach my children to obey out of love... how to get my boys to stop pushing each other's buttons... how to have enough love to keep giving and giving even when all my efforts to teach seem to be in vain. I mostly just need to involve the Lord more in my heart and do these righteous things more precisely so I can have the revelation and strength from the Lord. Why is it so hard to buckle down and study scriptures and pray every day? It shouldn't be when it's the very best thing to buoy our spirits. I have lessons to learn. Anyhoo... the section of her talk I loved best:
Personal Revelation
"A good woman knows that she does not have enough time, energy, or opportunity to take care of all of the people or do all of the worthy things her heart yearns to do. Life is not calm for most women, and each day seems to require the accomplishment of a million things, most of which are important. A good woman must constantly resist alluring and deceptive messages from many sources telling her that she is entitled to more time away from her responsibilities and that she deserves a life of greater ease and independence. But with personal revelation, she can prioritize correctly and navigate this life confidently.
"The ability to qualify for, receive, and act on personal revelation is the single most important skill that can be acquired in this life. Qualifying for the Lord’s Spirit begins with a desire for that Spirit and implies a certain degree of worthiness. Keeping the commandments, repenting, and renewing covenants made at baptism lead to the blessing of always having the Lord’s Spirit with us. Making and keeping temple covenants also adds spiritual strength and power to a woman’s life.
"Many answers to difficult questions are found by reading the scriptures because the scriptures are an aid to revelation. Insight found in scripture accumulates over time, so it is important to spend some time in the scriptures every day. Daily prayer is also essential to having the Lord’s Spirit with us. Those who earnestly seek help through prayer and scripture study often have a paper and pencil nearby to write questions and record impressions and ideas.
"Revelation can come hour by hour and moment by moment as we do the right things. When women nurture as Christ nurtured, a power and peace can descend to guide when help is needed.
"For instance, mothers can feel help from the Spirit even when tired, noisy children are clamoring for attention, but they can be distanced from the Spirit if they lose their temper with children. Being in the right places allows us to receive guidance. It requires a conscious effort to diminish distractions, but having the Spirit of revelation makes it possible to prevail over opposition and persist in faith through difficult days and essential routine tasks.
"Personal revelation gives us the understanding of what to do every day to increase faith and personal righteousness, strengthen families and homes, and seek those who need our help. Because personal revelation is a constantly renewable source of strength, it is possible to feel bathed in help even during turbulent times.
"We are told to put our trust in that Spirit which leads us “to do justly, to walk humbly, to judge righteously.” We are also told that this Spirit will enlighten our minds, fill our souls with joy, and help us know all things we should do. Promised personal revelation comes when we ask for it, prepare for it, and go forward in faith, trusting that it will be poured out upon us." Julie B. Beck April 2010 Gen Conf
To end on a slightly humorous note. No - I know I'm not funny, but this email I got was. My friend Wendi sent it to me and it did make me smile.
Glancing through the hymnal last Sunday I noted that as sisters in Zion, we who are called to serve, are all enlisted to go marching, marching forward because the world has need of willing men to all press on scattering sunshine. We wonder if we have done any good in the world today because we have been given much and want to do what is right, keep the commandments, press forward with the Saints, choose the right, and put our shoulders to the wheel going where He wants us to go. However, as the morning breaks high on the montain top, truth reflects upon our senses, and while we still believe that sweet is the work, we also realize that we have work enough to do ere the sun goes down. And thus we ask Thee ere we part, where can we turn for peace?
So onward I shall row... merrily, merrily down the stream...
